Mission: Incest
by Happymood
Summary: Sasuke wanted his brother too much. Maybe this plan would help him out a little. Humorous AU fic, in which the massacre never happened. Itasasu. One-shot. R&R!


**A.N. Itasasu AU fic that came to my mind when I was on sugar-high. XD. The massacre never happened and especially Sasuke may be act a little OOC. This is meant just for fun! Don't take it seriously. Hand wash. **

**Mission: Incest.**

Uchiha Sasuke didn't do anything on purpose. First of all, he didn't fell in love with his own brother on purpose. Sasuke knew he had always been attracted to him since he was little, but realized it was love only when he became fourteen. Sixteen years old Sasuke wasn't going to do anything, though. Incest wasn't good. He couldn't. What Itachi would say if he knew? Sasuke didn't want his brother to hate him. Sasuke preferred to stare at him from afar, waiting for his feelings to finally subside and return to a happy normal life… Sasuke didn't want anything. Being with Itachi was enough…

…

You didn't actually believe all that crap, did you? Sasuke had enough of staring! He wanted the real thing! Damn incest and social beliefs! He lusted too much for his own brother and he wanted him now! Well, he knew it was practically impossible to go there and tell Itachi: "You. Me. Bedroom" in his most sensual voice without his brother freaking out on him. Sasuke had to be discreet. He needed a plan to see if Itachi agreed on them… well, you know. If not, then Sasuke would do as he had previously said. If by the end of the day his brother didn't show that he might actually _love_ Sasuke back, then everything was off. Itachi really meant too much for him to lose him over his stupid hormones.

But, remember, Sasuke didn't do anything on purpose. Everything he does is innocent. Sasuke inside is laughing evilly, though.

_Stage 1_

That morning Sasuke hadn't predicted that Itachi that day would say yes to train a little with his little brother but the opportunity was too gold to let it go, for more reasons that one. Itachi, as an ANBU, had a lot of work to do but that day and the next he was surprisingly free. Was Sasuke going to let this opportunity go? Nope. So, as soon as Itachi said, ok, let's go outside, Sasuke had ran immediately in his room to collect all his weapons and to… well, you'll see later.

Itachi was a good teacher and Sasuke had still much too learn to be able to arrive to his level, but that day he had decided to make more mistakes than usual and threw his kunai more than once many meters away from the aim, making them fall in the bushes around them.

"Is there's something on your mind, Sasuke?" Itachi had asked him more than once but Sasuke had always looked sadly (cutely sadly) at his brother, whispering: "I'm never going to be good as you are…".

So when it was time for them to collect all the fallen kunai from out the bushes Sasuke immediately agreed it was he who must do it. Itachi didn't need to move an inch, just wait for him to be finished.

Sasuke would find the kunai, lean slowly down to collect it, showing his older brother a clear view of his back (Sasuke hadn't put his most revealing outfit for nothing) and would slowly stand up, kunai in hand. Sasuke didn't need to turn around and look at Itachi to know that every time he went down, Itachi would gasp even a little.

Sasuke didn't know if he was taking it too far but he never had the chance to find out because in that moment their father called them for lunch.

_Stage __2_

Well, Sasuke couldn't really call it stage two, because this time he _really_ hadn't done it on purpose. Sasuke needed a shower after training and it hadn't even crossed his mind he could use the fact to his advantage. So, it was pure coincidence when he exited the bathroom, wet from the shower, white towel around his hips, and encountered his brother coming out from his room.

At the sight of him Itachi stopped and Sasuke was quite unaware at the way Itachi was watching those little drops of water on Sasuke's skin travelling down from his dripping hair to his chest, slowly down his abdomen and his hipbone to hide behind the towel.

"Do you need anything, nii-san?" Sasuke asked, tilting his head to the side and more droplets fell on his shoulder to walk down the same path the previous ones had done. Sasuke was sure he saw Itachi gulping.

"The bathroom…" Itachi said laconically and slammed the bathroom door behind him. Sasuke stared at the door and wanted to smile if it wasn't for Fugaku who had decided to pass that way just in that moment.

"Did you do something to Itachi, Sasuke? He seemed upset…" his father said and Sasuke looked at him and shook his head.

"No, I didn't do anything…" Sasuke said, he was sure that Itachi had muttered a faint sarcastic _yeah, right_ behind the bathroom door. "He just needed the bathroom…" Sasuke continued then and moved to his room with a smile on his face.

_Stage __3_

That afternoon Itachi and Sasuke decided to watch a program on TV. Perfectly normal if it wasn't for the fact that Sasuke had, accidentally, a lollipop dangling from his mouth. Itachi was on the right corner of the couch, Sasuke on the left. The TV laughed and talked as if its two viewers were actually interesting in what it had to say.

Innocent Sasuke put the lollipop in his mouth, then took it out but not so much, touching it a little with his lips. Suddenly his tongue was out, licking it slowly and Sasuke moaned, just a little, enjoyed the strawberry taste it had. With a corner of his eyes, though, Sasuke was watching Itachi closely and his heart jumped a little when he saw Itachi staring at him. Sasuke made as if nothing was wrong and put the lollipop back in, then out, slowly, as if he wasn't licking a lollipop but well… something else.

Sasuke knew he had Itachi's full attention and that was a good thing as he started licking the lollipop, in a really inappropriate but innocent fashion.

"Boys!" suddenly Mikoto entered and Sasuke turned to his mother, only the stick of the lollipop showing. "I'm going shopping, do you need any… oh, dear! Itachi are you feeling well? You're burning up!"

Mikoto was all over Itachi, feeling his forehead, and Sasuke too looked at him with innocent worried eyes.

"I'm… I'm okay, mum…" Itachi said. Sasuke knew he had done a great job.

_Stage __4_

It was the easier stage of the plan.

During dinner Sasuke did… nothing. Yeah, exactly as you heard. Nothing, because sometimes the best reaction you get it when you do nothing. However, Sasuke had some problems trying repressing his laugh as Itachi throughout dinner looked at him suspiciously, expecting Sasuke to do who-knows-what at every moment. Even when Sasuke would stand up a little to take the salt, Itachi would observe his every movement with half lidded eyes, distrustful. Well, the boy was a genius and Sasuke knew it, so he expected his brother to realize something in Sasuke's behavior was wrong.

Sasuke found it amusing that his brother looked at him like that when he was going to do nothing but he continued doing as if nothing was going on, innocently eating what their mother had made for them.

They were dining alone, as both of their parents were preparing for a mission. Both of them would leave Konoha for a couple of days. A fortunate coincidence, Sasuke thought, that is _if _everything went as planned.

Itachi seemed to be relaxing but Sasuke knew he was still suspicious. Their father entered just then and looked at them both.

"Don't do anything reckless while we're away…" Fugaku said, tying his Konoha headband around his head.

Itachi was too stubborn and still hadn't broken, Sasuke pouted inside. Then he looked at his dad and smiled. Maybe… maybe…

"Itachi won't do anything… _naughty_, dad. Don't worry…" Sasuke said, slurring the 'naughty' a little. Fugaku looked at him.

"I meant you too, Sasuke, and you know it…"

"I'll be as… _gentle _as possible…"

Double meanings were the best and even if his dad hadn't caught on on what he was really saying, Sasuke knew that his older brother had his suspicions, but when he turned around to finish his dinner, Itachi's face was covered by the dark bangs of his hair and Sasuke couldn't see the expression he was making.

_Stage 5_

Naruto came later that evening to take a weapon back and Sasuke expected that because he had borrowed that weapon… accidentally, of course. They sat outside the Uchiha's house and talked about nothing important for a little while.

Sasuke knew that what he was going to do was wrong. Using Naruto in the way he was going to was bad, but he knew the blonde was still too naïve to realize what was actually happening. Sasuke knew that Itachi was somewhere behind them and he took the opportunity right away.

Sasuke and Naruto talked about a videogame they saw the day before in a store and as Naruto talked Sasuke leaned a little closer to the blond, then he would move his face closer to the younger boy, their cheeks almost touching.

Itachi was watching and that was a good sign.

Naruto suddenly looked at Sasuke and from behind it seemed like Naruto was going to kiss Sasuke, even if that wasn't the case. Sasuke leaned even closer. He thought he heard a growl.

Naruto, unaware, helped a little the situation too as he put his hand on Sasuke's tight to catch the raven's attention on something he thought he had seen. Sasuke had eyes only for the growling brother behind them. Then an idea occurred: it was this or everything had been pointless.

"Naruto…" Sasuke whispered, "Do you want to go… for a _walk_?" they way he had said 'walk' had seemed pretty innocent to Naruto's ears but not to Itachi's because just then the older boy came outside and coughed rather impolitely to get Naruto and Sasuke's attention.

"It's getting quite late, Naruto-kun. Shouldn't you be at home?" Itachi said and at the tone of his voice Naruto immediately stood up.

"Yeah, Itachi-san you're right… bye bye, Sasuke, see you tomorrow!"

"See you, Naruto-kun…" Sasuke said, smiling a little, as Naruto ran down the street back to his home. As soon as they were alone again he felt Itachi grab him from the shoulder and unceremoniously drag him inside, closing the door behind them.

"What are you doing, nii-san!" Sasuke exclaimed, because he really hadn't expected such a reaction. Itachi opened the door to his room and pushed Sasuke onto his bed.

"I know what you have been doing, Sasuke…" Itachi said, "And really I can't take it anymore…"

Sasuke repressed his smile: "What are you talking about, nii-san?" he said with his most innocent voice, his face red from the room's heat, his hair in his eyes, sprawled over Itachi's bed.

"You are so lucky mum and dad aren't here because I'm going to make you scream all night and tomorrow too!"

"Why?" Sasuke said, blinking just for emphasis, "Have I done something wrong?"

"That's it!" and Itachi grabbed him and kissed him breathlessly. Sasuke smirked.

Mission: success!


End file.
